I Was Not Yet Who I Would Be

Feb 28

I can remember when I was in the midst of my coming out journey, feeling as though I had lost so many aspects of my identity. I was no longer who I had been (and who so many folks had thought I had been) and I apparently was not yet who I would be.

I remember going to my first Pride celebrations that year as a newly out human (I felt like I'd just emerged from my cocoon...my wings were still wet!) 🦋 and feeling a bit of a fraud. Like anyone who looked at me would know I was an imposter (still a caterpillar? 🐛), like I didn't know if I was queer *enough*.

(I guess that was Late in Life Queer Imposter Syndrome! 🤣)

It was a time of intense self-discovery, awesome personal revelation and tremendous transformation for me.

And I felt as fluid as a flowing river of water.

During that time, that scary/exciting/grief-filled/multi-sensory time, I did not know who I was. But I was there for the experience. I was in it. And I trusted that I would eventually find myself again.

And during that time I art journaled...like my life depended on it. Because it did.

Art journaling was my life support system, my buoy. Through my art journal pages I was able to express parts of my experience that had no other expression. The feelings, the images, the colors, the textures...all of it was my lifeline to self-awareness and self-determination.

I did come out the other side...again and again and again.

Check out my 8-week deep dive, The Way of Transition, if this topic calls to you. I’d love to share my passion, wisdom and respect for transitions with you.

Book a Discovery Call or comment below if you're curious at all. I'd love to talk to you about the richness of this program!