More thoughts on self-care during a pandemic...
This is a very strange time we’re living in.
We are disconnected by order of law and yet we are reaching out to each other in many ways to stay in a connected space. I know, for me, personally, this is a very stressful experience both in the connection and disconnection. Just navigating space with other people stresses me out and hurts my heart. I feel like I don’t know how to handle these new social protocols. Too much time alone exhausts me. Too much time on the screen exhausts me. Going out to walk the dog exhausts me.
Humans need connection. It’s something that we thrive on socially, emotionally, intellectually, spiritually. Lack of connection affects our health and well-being in all kinds of ways. And, in fact, the opposite of connection (isolation) is a well known and much used method of torture or punishment.
According to social psychologist Matthew D. Lieberman, author of the book Social: Why Our Brains are Wired to Connect, our need to connect is as “fundamental as our need for food and water.” “We suffer greatly when our social bonds are threatened or severed…our well-being depends on our connections with others.” (from “Why We are Wired to Connect,” in Scientific American.)
In the current moment we are, by necessity, isolating ourselves as much as possible because the threat to our health and existence is real. And so, we reach out. We yearn to connect. The computer, the phone, a walk with a dear friend six feet apart. However, with the people with whom we’re hunkering down, there may even be too much connection. Oy...How to balance all of this?
hat are we missing? Human touch, sound, smells? Hugs and pats on the back, a hand to hold, lips to kiss? Voices singing in unison in one room? The vibration of many instruments in an orchestra all playing the same concerto? How different is it to see someone across the screen as opposed to across the kitchen table?
