The World Turned Upside Down
My heart hurts.
Four years ago, in the midst of the 2016 election cycle I thought it really couldn't get a lot worse. Such a contentious battle. Our country being pulled apart in the middle. It felt like a tug-of-war with no winners, no getting out without horrible burns on everyone's hands.
And then the election.
I was in the hospital with my mom, who was gravely ill. That night as I watched the election results roll in I felt incredibly devastated and alone. As the truth of it all became painfully clear I tried to meet the eyes of every nurse who came into the room to tend to my mom, I tried to say: "You're not alone. We can't be alone now. We must believe we can survive whatever comes next." I just could not believe what I saw happening. It felt like the morning we saw the Twin Towers fall. It was that kind of disbelief. I know you know what I mean.
Throughout that whole year I'd been brewing the idea for Creative Life Raft online. My art journal was bulging with images that reflected my pain and fear and dismay.
My art journal really WAS my creative life raft. Every time I was in the studio I would throw myself on it and use color, imagery, my words, other people's words, texture, drips, splatters, tears* and tears** to express how my heart was breaking...and to stay afloat. Head above the water. I didn't want to drown in fear, anxiety, and despair.
[*from my eyes]
[**ripped paper]
For some reason, though, I never did start Creative Life Raft online.
At some point that year or the next I even started creating a book proposal with this concept that creativity can save you in the hardest, most challenging times of your life. I put together my philosophy, my original art journaling prompts, and my images and sent it off to a publisher.
No luck. At least not that time (I may just try again soon).
I put Creative Life Raft in my digital file cabinet and forgot about it. And then the pandemic started. It was clearly time to take a look at Creative Life Raft online again. I went digging and lo and behold, I really couldn't believe it. It was ready to go.
And so we began. On March 16th we had our first gathering on Zoom. People from all over the world came together. The magnetic pull of a creative circle was strong. The possibility that you could somehow save yourself with art making felt right to so many. My community wanted to save themselves from drowning in the waters of the unknown.
We've been sheltering-in-place ever since. Almost 80 days. Our whole lives seem to take place online in Zoom grids. I don't have to tell you how that is.
You know.
I know you know.
AND today the world is even MORE out of control. Our future feels even MORE unsure. Every day we are feeling the shattering of things we thought were strong or maybe we are seeing the things we knew couldn't last finally fall. Either way, we see that more is to come, nothing is stable. It's like watching a tornado approach.
And before I go any further I want to give you some resources for helping those on the frontlines of the fight against injustice, racial bias, transphobia, authoritarian politics, and inequity in our country.
What I want to tell you today is that it's more important than EVER that you find a way to take care of your heart, your nervous system, your mental health.
One option: Art journaling with me. Art journaling with me is NOT about making pretty pictures (not to say there isn't a place for that somewhere in your life). Art journaling with me in Creative Life Raft is about letting your shadow show.
It's about unleashing some of the stuff you've been stuffing down.
It's about feeling the pain and heartache and fear and anxiety and ALSO feeling the catharsis that happens when you release it onto the page.
It's finding the images and colors and words that express what is bubbling up inside you.
And it's letting the spirit guide you.
In the end, you say, "Wow. I didn't realize that was inside me. But now that it's out, I feel changed. I feel transformed. I feel relief."
And you can get to the peace, the calm. You can nourish your soul.
Now isn't the time to walk away from your creative practice because of how scared or desperate you're feeling. Now is the time to make sure you make time to create. How nourishing it is to engage in creation during a time of so much destruction!
And to do so in a circle of like-hearted people. The circle in and of itself is nourishing. Being held, being witnessed, being able to be inspired and unleash what's under the surface. THIS is so important in these strange, isolating, and troubling times.
Whatever you feel called to do, whether it's with me online in Creative Life Raft, or something else you do on your own or with others, I support your efforts. I support you in caring for you and making sure you are nourished and finding peace wherever you can find it.
I don't have a panacea for you. I don't have any answers. But I do have this: Creative Life Raft. I hope hope hope you'll join me. Join us. Sometime soon. The schedule is below.
Sending you big love in these very challenging times!
